New Day...

I woke up to the sound of the alarm going off early this morning.  The days had become shorter, so the daylight wasn’t creeping in through the curtains today.  I reached over to the nightstand and was feeling around to silence that horrible buzzing that woke me each and every morning.  I felt his arms tighten around my waist as I stretched and he groaned “5 more minutes....”  I yawned to myself and wished I could take those 5 minutes in his arms, but I knew I would not get up in time for work if I did. 

“Baby come on we have to go to work” I said as I tried to unwrap myself from him.  He smiled in his sleep as he tightened his hold on me.  I was giggling as I struggled against him “Luke come on! Get your butt in gear.”  Lucas groaned and shifted away from me as I got up out of bed.  I looked over my shoulder at the man whom had claimed my heart entirely.  It was rather surprising how we met, but nonetheless I was happier than I had ever been.

As I stepped into the shower I let my mind drift to the events that had past.  All the travelling I did, cutting almost all of my friends out of my life, starting fresh, building a new better me, and finally meeting Luke...I felt complete. I was no longer that weak little girl who relied on everyone, or cared what people thought.  I was finally doing me.  I stepped out of the shower with a towel wrapped around me and walked straight to the closet in search of my outfit for work.  When I turned around there was Luke with a cup of tea in hand for me and a coffee for him as he winked, kissed me on the cheek and walked into the bathroom.  I bit my lip as I watched him walk, I still couldn’t get enough of him. 

I was putting on my make up as he came out of the shower and I had the chance to watch his 6’ frame walk into our bedroom in the mirror.  His blue eyes sparkled as he saw me checking him out and he teased me by dropping his towel and walking slowly over to me.  I turned quickly and put my hands up to stop him, I was already dressed, hair dried and almost ready to walk out the door.  “No no no!! I am already dressed Luke!!”  I said to him half giggling half serious, when he bypassed me slightly, slapped my hip a bit to move and grabbed some underwear. 

I moved quickly to finish up in the mirror and got out of his way so he could get dressed.  He came down shortly after I did looking handsome in his slacks and dress shirt, and I pulled together what we called ‘breakfast on the run’.  We kissed each other goodbye before we got into our cars and pulled away to our respective jobs.  I was in a good mood when I had walked into the office, but noticed one person missing at her desk...Rhian. I walked over to my cubical and fired up my computer and quickly got to work on my emails.  I am working at a travel agency’s head office, and I was responsible for fielding the inquiries sent through their websites, compliments and complaints and then forwarding them off to the flagship stores for further details as required.  It wasn’t much but I enjoyed it...at least for now.

By midday Rhian still wasn’t in, and when I took a good look over at her desk I noticed that her picture frame was missing.  I knew that travel was taking a hard hit right now, but I didn’t think they would start downsizing this early, but what did I know.  I got up to stretch and make myself a cup of tea, and ran into Amanda in the break room.  Amanda was a gossip, so I figured if anyone would’ve heard anything, she must’ve.  Plus she’s been around for a while and people tend to trust her with information she shouldn’t know.  “Well its better than Rhian’s, I will say that much” she said as she reached for the coffee.  “What do you mean?” I asked kind of surprised by her statement.  “I heard from a source that she was getting laid off.  And she’s not the only one on the block; there are a bunch of people who are also on the chopping block...”  She eyed me and that instantly got me worried.  I hadn’t been there much longer than Rhian, but I was also not an assistant. Not that it mattered in anyway, but I figured that since I was the last to start I might be the first to go.   I made my tea quickly and returned to my desk and started diligently working away on my correspondence. 

I was nearing the end of my day, and the seemingly endless emails when my desk phone rang.  I looked at the caller ID and saw “Shelia Coberson” on the screen, she was an HR generalist.  “Thank you for calling, this is Isabella how can I help you?”  “Hi Isabella, this is Shelia can you please come downstairs to HR as soon as you can?”

**Are any of you interested in hearing more about Rhian?  Monroe?  Duane?  Leave a request in the comments**

Hey All!

I know I promised a post today, and it will either be up later tonight or tomorrow.

Sorry guys!  I had a 4 day weekend...FINALLY and really just lazed around and relaxed.

I am currently working/editing as I go and will try my hardest to have it up by tonight.

thanks so much
xo B

PS I got the message about the font, I have no problems changing it at all. Once I figure out how to do that LOL

Thanks for Voting

It was a very close race indeed! Which came right down to the wire.

Looks like it was a small margin, but I will start in present day and do some flashbacks.

If there is anything else within the story line you would like clarified please comment below.

Thanks everyone!

I will be posting once a week on a Monday to start, and it will begin Monday September 14, 2015.

xo
B

Sorry For the Disappearing Act....

I don't really know how many readers I have left out there to read this, but whomever is still left I owe you a great apology!  The last 5 months have been so craptastic that I had lost my will to write.

Long story short...I was dating someone and it didn't work out.  Then my best friend and I stopped talking to each other (which had nothing to do with the former).

My hours at my job have been scaled back so much I had to get a fourth job to try and make ends meet.  Shortly there after my grandfather took ill and I was spending time with him getting him back to his healthy 90something self.  Just when I thought things would be getting back on track, my uncle got sick....was hospitalized....came home and passed away.

So as you can tell I have not had a great deal of time to get to write.  If I wasn't exhausted from working, I was exhausted from caring for my family.  But now I think I may have some time to blog again if anyone is left out there still.

I was also very sad to see that some of my favourite blogs to read while I was back and forth are coming to an end.  I truly enjoyed reading Life's Greatest Journey, New York Dixie and New Beginnings, New Adventures.  I often emailed Arianna for advice and she had been so helpful to me.

So I will put this to a vote to whomever is left and let the vote last for 2 weeks from today.

For those of you who read on your mobile, you will have to switch to web viewing to vote.  The vote box will be in the top right corner.

First Stop...Sarasota

I returned the next day to see David at Flight Centre with my ideal itinerary in hand.  I was excited and scared at the same time, as I had never travelled alone.  I had not even told Duane or Monroe what I was planning on doing, I was going to as soon as I had tickets in hand and on my way to discovering where I was going in my life.  I sat across from David who anxiously was awaiting my list, which of course would probably result in a huge commission for him.  I handed him the list and he scanned the list.  “Nothing too crazy here Bella, we can totally do this and keep it under cost.  But I am going to suggest you fly out initially from Buffalo.  It will save you so much; do you think you can get down there okay?  There is a bus that leaves from Union Station and takes you across the border.”  “Yea I can handle it, I have to get used to travelling alone, since I am doing this entire trip alone.  And I checked out that web site you gave me and have reserved a location to stay in once I have a flight plan.”

He went to work straight away “So you’ve chosen Florida as your first stop.  Any place specific?”  “Well I would love to go to Orlando, but I think I should probably wait on that one.  I want to go on rides and don’t really want my first stop to be laden in single rider calls.” I chuckled at the last part of my statement.  He smiled at me and nodded.  “How about trying Sarasota first? Then maybe you can get a taste of what the warm weather will be like and you can go from there.  I am sure you can make some friends down there and convince them to go to Orlando with you!” I had not considered Sarasota and went to work quickly on Air BnB checking out places to stay.  I wanted to keep costs down so I decided to just rent a room to start.  I was searching and found one for less than $100 a night.  I read the reviews while David took a look at flights, and I was sold.  The person offering the room had wonderful reviews from other travellers, and it even said he wasn’t really home much but would offer as much help as possible.  “Okay David, book Sarasota.  I found a place to rent and I am booking it right now.”  He smiled and booked me on a flight leaving in a week to Sarasota, and staying for a week there.  He then quickly went through the rest of my list and started rhyming out my itinerary.  Each place he had booked he gave me a week to ten days in.  He suggested I wait on Europe as it was looking expensive but he would contact me if he found anything after I had already started travelling.  I was beyond ecstatic.

He handed me my itinerary after I had paid, and I was walking out with a huge smile on my face.  I had to get home and start packing, and for those of you who know women always over pack.  I was practically skipping down the street, I was finally doing something for myself and I couldn’t be happier. 

*****

A week later I was on my way to sunny Sarasota.  I had decided to tell Duane and Monroe the other day and while they thought I was crazy to do this on my own, they supported my reasoning.  After my four hour flight and a short cab ride I was standing in front of a place I would call home for a week.  I called Aaron, the guy I rented from, and told him I was here.  He quickly came walking out of the house running his hand through his hair and he was gorgeous! “Hi, umm, shit.  We have a problem.”  I looked at him confused and a little defeated, and thought great...when it rains it pours.  “The website double booked that room and the other couple got here about 10 minutes ago.  I double checked and realized what had happened and I instantly demanded they refund your cash, but clearly that won’t help you now.  I feel horrible Isabella.  So I am going to let you stay up in my apartment for a week and I am going to go crash at a friend’s house.  I feel horrible.  But I won’t charge you a dime, and it is a 2 bedroom!  Please forgive me; I don’t know what happened....” I let go of my suitcase and put my hand on his arm “Aaron it is okay don’t worry.  I am sure we can find a way to live together for a week.  You said it yourself you’re not home much so it is perfectly fine.  I don’t plan on being home much, I want to explore Sarasota.  And I am not a party girl, so I won’t disturb you.  I am only here for a week; I think we can make this work.”  I looked him in the eye and he seemed to relax and smiled.  He grabbed my suitcase and walked me up to his apartment.  It had a gorgeous view, and it was just as spacious as the unit I had tried to rent.  He showed me to my room which was nice and cozy and then showed me around the unit.    It felt like a home away from home for me, and I was excited.  Despite his claim he wasn’t around much, Aaron and I got on really well during my stay; he even joined me on some touristy attractions like the Sarasota Jungle Gardens.  I figured out how to get to the Siesta Key Public Beach and spent a lot of time there relaxing.  We spent a couple nights in and I cooked while telling him about my upcoming trip, leaving out the disastrous few years of my life leading up to this.  He took me out on my last night there to a little Japanese restaurant.  “So I wanted to ask you, what brought this trip on.  I’ve tried to bring it up but you didn’t seem like you wanted to talk about it, and I still understand if you don’t.”  I put down my menu and took a sip of water, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to talk to him about this or not.  Did I really want to ruin my last night with him?  “I tell you what, I will tell you at the end of my trip.”  I winked figuring it was the best way to avoid the question again.  “Ok deal” he said “What is your next stop Madame Traveller?”  “Orlando, I have always wanted to go to Disney and Universal.  I was hoping I would’ve met a few more people while I was here and maybe convince them to come with me, but it’s cool.  I will be ok up there.  I booked another room on Air BnB and leave tomorrow morning.”  I picked up my menu and continued reading.  Aaron stared at me and smiled before he picked up his menu and started looking at stuff he wanted to order.  We had a wonderful final evening together, dinner was nice and we walked after dinner to fight the overload of sushi we had eaten. 

After we got back I immediately started to pack up all my stuff and move the suitcase out to the living room.  I wanted to be ready to go when I had to wake up to get to the airport.  Aaron didn’t say too much when we got back, other than asking if I needed a lift to the airport.  I politely declined and had already arranged a taxi to pick me up.  We stared at each other awkwardly and then he hugged me and wished me well on my next journey.  I smiled and hugged him back and thanked him for everything.

The next morning I was up and trying to be quiet as I shoved my pajamas into my suitcase and even left Aaron a thank you note and went down to get into my taxi.  On my way to the airport I had felt relaxed and like I was actually doing what I wanted to do.  I giggled to myself as I realized I was headed to the ‘happiest place on earth’....next stop Disney World!

Wednesday....

Hey Readers

There won't be a post tonight. I have been called into work all weekend to deal with an incompetent employee. I have the post done but need to edit it and tweak it a bit. I should have it posted by Wednesday afternoon.

I am sorry that it won't be tonight but I will try and make at least one post per week.

Where To?

After Duane left I needed to call someone, so of course I called Monroe.  And of course it went to voicemail; I often forget that I am the only one who is not working sometimes.  Hey Monroe it’s Bella, call me back when you have a chance, you will never guess what just happened to me. As I hung up my phone started to ring from a private number.  Now usually I do not answer them, but I thought maybe it was Monroe calling from somewhere.  “Hello?”  I answered rather quickly.  “Hey Beautiful...”  I rolled my eyes as that accent was so familiar. “What do you want Craig?  You and Chloe have your baby and you want me to be the godmother?”  I asked him with sarcasm.  “When are you going to forgive me and let me make it up to you?”  He tried his best to sweet talk me, even after so much time had passed.  I hadn’t heard from him since that farce of a rehearsal dinner.  “About the time that hell freezes over and I become Queen of England.”  He knew that was about the time I would hang up...“Bella don’t hang up.I know that you and Joel aren’t together anymore...and I miss you so much!! I realize I was an arse and that I deserved everything you did to me and more, but please baby...I love you!   It has always been you!!”  “I am not even entertaining your pleas for forgiveness. If it was a one and done I might have been able to look the other way, but for you to parade it all over town, and for my BEST friend to tell me and show me pictures...and then the fucking icing on the cake you bring her into our HOME...MY HOME...and fuck her that was unforgivable.  You fucked it up, you tried to blame me, and now you’re alone and you miss me??? I hope you suffer the wrath of a thousand flea bites on your crotch and arms too short to scratch!!!”  I hung up my phone and took a deep breath.  How fucking dare he call....

But that fuelled my fire to get the fuck out of dodge.  First thing was first...I packed up my cheque and bundled up for the cold.  I left the loft and headed straight to the bank and deposited my inheritance into my bank account.  Once I was done there I headed straight to Telus, I needed a new phone, a new plan and a new phone number.  I decided to pre-order the Samsung S6 edge, since it was going to be released in 3 days, but secured a new phone number and negotiated a plan for myself and customer service.  I left Telus feeling like I had just started my new journey.  Next stop was a travel agent.  As I walked through downtown I stopped in at a Flight Centre, time to start planning...

“Hi I am David, can I help you?”

“Hi David, my name is Bella.  I hope you can help me, I have, without giving too much away, had the worse 5 years of my life and am now going to travel the world and figure out where I want to go from here.  So I need to best deal to do that.  I have a list of places I want to go and check out, but I need help from an expert on how to do this...without spending millions of dollars that I don’t have.”

He smiled sadly at me and started in on the list that I had on my phone.  Scotland, England, Spain, France, Italy, Dominican Republic, Jamaica, Texas, Florida, Louisiana, Hawaii, British Columbia (to visit my brother), Japan, California (no not to visit Joel), Nevada (back to VEGAS!!!!), New York (Visit Monroe, obvi!)  David set to work on my list telling me that some places may be more expensive than others due to single occupancy, but that he would leave those for the end so that in case I met a travel buddy the price would go down.  So he asked the dreaded question “Where to first?”  I sighed, as I didn’t know the answer.  I wanted to go somewhere warm; I needed a break from the negative weather.  But if I went then I would need a travel buddy.  I sighed “I don’t know, I had not thought about the single occupancy and I really don’t want to pay for 2 people just to have my own room...but I need to go somewhere warm first...definitely warm....” He nodded and smiled searching different warm places that I could visit before he whispered “Have you checked out Air BNB?  It is a website that you can rent peoples apartments or rooms in their houses while you’re travelling.  It would totally save you some cash rather than staying at a hotel.  Check it out while I do some number crunching and maybe come back tomorrow around 3pm.  Maybe we can start in California or Florida.  Check out those two places first, and we can discuss findings then.  Leave me your number and I will call you if I find anything amazing before then.”  I wrote down my name and number and David stood and shook my hand and showed me out. 

I left feeling like I had accomplished a little bit, I may not have a ticket yet but I was starting out somewhere.  I walked back to the loft and was greeted at the front desk with a bouquet of star gazer lilies.  I shook my head knowing, hoping but still, it was from Craig.  I took them upstairs and put them on the counter before opening the card, and to my surprise they were from Monroe;

Baby Girl,

 Daphne called and told me what happened to your dad and I wish I could’ve been there for you.  I know that you would tell me you’re alright but I know you better than you know yourself and you were hoping for that second chance with him.  I love you babes, come to NYC!!!

~Monroe

 

I put the flowers in water and moved over to my tablet and downloaded Air BNB.  I started researching places in California where I wanted to go and see what was offered.  I was a little shocked at some of the daily rates for apartments.  But when I factored in that I wouldn’t be eating out every single night and that I would have all the luxuries of home, it kind of made me want to not stay in a hotel.  I sat back and thought about how many of my friends have kind of ditched me in the last little while.  I know I wasn’t a treat to be around, but still I was always there for them.  With the exception of Arianna; she was still calling and texting daily.  Fuck the rest of them I thought to myself.  I was going to move away from everyone if my life depended on it, there had to be better friends out there somewhere.

I had searched Los Angeles and San Francisco on the website and had a few ideas in mind.  I didn’t want to blow all the money I had just gotten but I wanted to use a good chunk of it on myself, plus I still had all that jewellery to pawn.  I got up and started to make dinner and put on a This is Where I Leave You.  I thought the title was kind of fitting for what I was planning to do. 

I awoke the next day with my dirty dishes sitting in front of me, and the DVD replaying on the TV.  I checked my phone which had a few missed calls on it and a couple texts.  It was running low on battery so I charged it while going through the log.  Of course Craig called...again.  Ignore.  Monroe had called back and texted that he was super busy but would call me tonight. And I had a text from Joel; which surprised me since I hadn’t talked to him since I left him.  I looked at the time and realized I had to get over to flight center in a few hours to see what Joel had come up with. So I quickly scanned my app and marked a few places I was interested in.  But not knowing the area, I didn’t know if I was close to anything.  I turned my phone off and left it to charge, while I busied myself with dishes and a shower before I had to go.  As I was getting dressed I smiled to myself that I was actually moving on, I was growing up on my own terms.  I walked out to the living room and turned off the TV, grabbed my purse and phone and headed out on my walk to see David.

I walked in and David got up to greet me, I never noticed how charming and boy next door good looking he was.  But when he smiled and shook my hand I felt giddy.  We sat at his desk and he opened up a file in front of him.  “I have good news and bad news...which do you want first?”  I instantly felt deflated, like this wasn’t going to happen now.  “Bad news first I guess...” I responded.  “Well the bad news is I won’t get to see you after next week.”  I looked at him confused.  “I’ve gotten you several options in California and Florida.  Did you check out that app I told you about?”  I started to laugh “That was bad news?!  I thought you were going to tell me it was going to cost me a billion dollars to do what I want to do!!”  He smiled and I noticed he had one dimple in his right cheek. “Bella you will be gone as of next week if you want.  Now where do you want to go first?”

**Please vote in the top right corner on her next stop....I will be posting again Monday based upon the votes of my readers**

Time Travelling....

***Fair warning my dear readers.  This is blog is going to quickly skim through the travelling years of Bella and take a huge time jump to January 2015.  The next three posts will be a span of a few years of her travelling and finding herself, and ultimately I will attempt to bring us up to date.  If you don’t like that, I apologize but this is how I am going to do it....***

January 2015

I was woken up by the sunlight pouring into my room.  I stretched and smiled and almost forgot where I was.  I got up out of my bed and opened the curtains and stared out at the sun rising over the trees and bit my lower lip.  I smiled again to myself and shook my head, I did it.  I felt two arms wrap around me and the scruff of his chin hit my neck “You’re up early baby” he said to me as he kissed my neck and pressed his morning erection into me.  I smiled feeling absolutely happy and satisfied.  It may have taken a few years and a lot of searching, but I finally found myself...

But that is now...and this is going to wrap up then....

I was sent into a tail spin as I took off out of that hospital.  I heard Joel calling after me as I left the room, trailing after me was Monroe and Duane.  My phone immediately starting ringing and I knew it was him, but I was in no mood to hear his excuses.  I had enough of men treating me like I was gullible and if they sweet talk me I would just be okay with everything.

My phone wouldn’t stop ringing, so I just turned it off.  I knew Joel would start in on Monroe soon, but I told everyone to shut their phones off.  When we got to the hotel Trevor was sitting on the bed flipping through channels on the TV.  I saw his face as I went into autopilot and grabbed my suitcase and started to pack.  I wasn’t even folding anything...just throwing all my items into the bag.  I heard whisperings of Monroe telling Trevor what happened.  I felt Trevor come up behind me and place his hand on my shoulder and it was then that I broke down.  I sank to the floor and started sobbing uncontrollably, Trevor sank with me and wrapped his arms around me and I cried into this chest.  I couldn’t understand why this happened to me again, why was I so stupid to trust and love the wrong men?

I felt a warm cocoon form around me and I knew the real men in my life were surrounding me.  All of them telling me it will be ok, and that they would always be there for me. How much Joel had fucked up, and that he wasn’t worth my time.  All the things I should’ve wanted to hear right then, but all I wanted was for me to wake up from this nightmare and to be able to see that it was all a joke....

8 Months After the Kiss

Joel and I never recovered from his indiscretion, there was no way back from it.  Sure it was ‘Just a kiss’ but I was broken after Craig, and at that point cheating...was cheating. 

For those that wonder, he is up and walking again, and that while Jennifer pursued him, he never kept in contact with her.  He did reach out once more after he was up and mobile and asked me to come see him.  Against my better judgement I went, I knew I had to end this on a better note.  I talked, he begged, but we both knew it was over.  I couldn’t simply forget anymore than he could take it back.  He wanted us to be friends, but we both knew that was just a statement that is thrown out there when nothing is left to say.  I walked out of his house and his life one last time.

When I got back to Toronto and sat in Monroe’s condo and realized I needed a fresh start.  Away from everyone and everything that reminded me of Joel, Craig, Chloe, Mark...  I got my engagement ring, wedding band, and a few other pieces Craig had given me and went to have them appraised.  I met with an appraiser and he told me that I was sitting on close to 35k worth of diamonds, possibly more if sold to the right person.  I was shocked, but apparently Craig had chosen almost flawless diamonds.  I asked if he knew anyone who would pay the top dollar amount and he gave me a list of people, including him, who would when I was ready.

I walked back home and on my walk I realized that this was now my time to do whatever I wanted. I could move where ever I wanted.  I had no one holding me back, and I realized that most of the men in my life had moved on as well; Monroe was in NYC and Duane had moved to BC for work (even though I had to push him to go).  He still came home every once in a while.  He even met a very nice woman, Carrie, whom he was "living with" when he came home.  So it seemed everyone else was moving on, now it was my time. 

I remembered my time in California with Monroe and how much I loved it there, and before any of you think it, I wanted to be far away from where Joel was.  But I also loved NYC, but I didn’t want to be shadowed by Monroe or Trevor.  I needed to go where, as cliché as this sounds, where nobody knew me.  On my way home I realized that I had let my college letters expire, maybe looking at those would give me some insight as to where I wanted to head.  I walked into the building and headed up to the loft.  I grabbed the letters from beside the door and sat on the couch opening them up; NYU, UCLA, U of Toronto, Ryerson, UBC, USC, U of Miami, U of Hawaii (anyone noticing a warm climate theme here?! LOL).   I hadn’t opened any of the letters that had arrived, so I figured now was a good time.  One by one I opened them up and laid them face down on the table. 

I got up and put my jewellery back in the safe and went and made a cup of tea.  I knew I was just putting off any further rejection but I was also hoping that there would be at least one or two acceptance letters.  I sat down and was about to start flipping them over when my phone rang and it was my mother.  I rolled my eyes as I reached to answer it...

“Hello Mom” I said.  “Hi Baby, I was just wondering if you had time to come see me.  I’ve been trying to get a hold of your brother but he’s not answering.  Is he with you?”  She replied sounding a little depressed.

“No Mom, he is probably with his girlfriend if he's home.  What’s wrong?”  I asked trying to sound concerned.  “I’d rather have this conversation face to face with both of you.  Can you maybe find him and the both of you get up here as soon as possible?”

“Yea I’ll track him down.  I will call you back.”  I hung up with her and called Duane who picked up right away.  “Hey Sis, what’s up?”  “Mom has been calling you, she wants us to come and see her as soon as possible.  Are you free tomorrow, can you pull yourself away from Carrie for 24 hours???”  I asked a little sarcastically.  He laughed at my statement “yea I will come now and we will go up and get it over with.”  He hung up and I called my mom back and said we would be there within a few hours or so.

Long story short, our mom told us that our father had passed away.  After he had left us and started a new family he was rather successful in business.  But he had only changed his will to add on his new wife and son.  Duane and I were still beneficiaries, and stood to inherit a large sum of money.  His new wife tried to contest the will but my father made sure it was iron clad and that his estate would be divided equally between the four of us.  Daphne, our mom, directed us to the lawyer’s office to whom was handling our late father’s estate and at the end of the day we were walking out of the office with two envelopes in hand that would make us financially comfortable for once in our lives.  This was the answer I was looking for...I was now able to financially fund my “finding myself” dream.

Duane and I returned to the loft and opened the envelopes.  Inside we each had a letter from our father and a cheque from his estate.

My Dear Isabella,

While you may not know it, I was there for every one of your milestones.  While I may not have physically come to you, I was there.  Your high school graduation was one of the hardest things for me.  I was standing in the back and for a split second I thought you saw me and I cried so hard.  You have turned out to be such a beautiful, smart, young woman.  Your mother did such a wonderful job raising you.  I wish that I had tried harder to stay in your life, and I have no one to blame but myself for my absence.  You have a younger brother named Raymond, and I hope one day you two can become friends and possibly family down the road.  Isabella there is so much I want to apologize for but clearly I didn’t get that chance, and while I could write it here...it wouldn’t be the same.  But I am sorry for every let down, heartache and tear you have endured at my hands.  That is something I will never be able to forgive myself for.  I know that me leaving you an inheritance won’t take away any of that, but I hope that in some way it can help you with any future endeavours. 

Despite everything, I did love you Isabella.  You will always be daddy’s princess in his heart.

Love, Dad

Duane had not let me read his letter, which I understood.  He stayed for a bit as we sat in silence, and then he got up and left to go home.  He hugged me tightly and silently left.   After I sat back and re read that letter, I decided that I was going to travel for a little bit.  So I cleared away the letters and grabbed my laptop and started to list all the places I wanted to go and ultimately where I was going to end up in the end....

I have a post ready...

Hey All who are still with me!!


I have a post ready to go, but it is quite long....

do you want me to split it into two posts or just give you one LOOOOOOONG post???

Comment below!!!

Same Boat...Different Passenger....

“Tell me what?” I looked back and forth between my guys; searching their faces for any sign of what I was supposed to be told.  All of a sudden they were all silent and no one would say a word. Duane and Monroe made eyes at Joel, while he sat there looking back and forth between them.

“Someone tell me what the FUCK is going on!”  I started to raise my voice.  My inner bitch was coming out, mostly due to lack of sleep.  “I...well you see...” Joel stammered.  I was glaring at Joel, I had a suspicion as to what he was trying to get out, but I wanted to hear it from him.  “Tell her what we walked in on Joel...”Duane stated in a very angry tone.  “Look it was nothing...it didn’t mean anything to me at all...Isabella I swear to you...”

My eyes welled up with tears, after everything I went through with Craig, it was like déjà vu.  “You son of a bitch!” I started at him and Monroe stopped me in my tracks and wrapped his arms around me.  “How could you do this to me?!  You knew what I went through with Craig and you cheat on me...when I came to YOU!  I came to help YOU, and this is how you repay me?!”  I was literally screaming at him and a nurse came rushing in telling me to keep it down.  “Me keep it down?! How about you tell your slut nurses to keep their hands off of the patients????  Are you running a hospital or a goddamn brothel?!!”  I didn’t care if they called security or not, I was furious!

“What are you talking about young lady? We only hire the most upstanding people to work in this hospital.  I am sure you’re mistaken.”  The nurse said to me.  “Well if by upstanding you mean pawing at the patients and sticking their tongue down their throats .... That must be a new way of taking ones temperature...” Duane said to the nurse.  She looked at us shocked by his statement and quickly turned to go look at his chart and see who has been tending to him.  She clicked a button on some kind of radio thing around her neck “Call Jennifer Straton” the machine said “Calling Jennifer Straton...I’m sorry Jennifer Straton is not reachable at the moment would you like to leave a message?”  She clicked the button twice hanging up.  She looked at us and then clicked the button “Locate Jennifer Straton” the radio came back with “Jennifer Straton is in G2”.  She turned in a huff and started her search of the floor.

“Isabella please listen to me, yes she kissed me, yes they saw it, but I didn’t do anything to provoke her I swear” Joel said to me looking me dead in the eyes.  “You also did nothing to stop her did you?! DID YOU?  You know if I did something like that, you would be furious and looking to kick some ass, well guess what sweetheart...I am going to be kicking some ass!”  The nurse walked back in with Jennifer in tow “What is it Ruth?  Does the patient need help?  What is wrong...?” As she looked around the room, her face went white but then she blushed when she looked at Joel.  “Jennifer these people have some very serious accusations of your conduct with this patient. As you know the hospital policy, it could result in termination of your position.  You have only one chance to help yourself here.  Now did you or did you not make sexual advances towards this patient?”  “I...I...uhh...well...he kissed me and I tried to stop him...” she stammered out.  “WHAT? I kissed you?! Try that again, you kissed me...you said and I quote ‘you are so hot, I can’t help myself.’”  “I did not!! You were all over me, pawing at me and telling me to get into your bed.” 

“Enough with the back and forth, there were 4 lips and two belonged to you and two belonged to you.   I however would like to see the manager of the unit and would like to see the head of the nursing staff.  I will be filing a complaint, and you are very lucky I am not calling my lawyer.” I stated very loudly.  Nurse Ruth nodded and escorted Jennifer out of the room, whispering very loudly that she was in very deep trouble.  I turned my anger towards Joel who looked whiter than a sheet “A lawyer?  Do you really feel that would be necessary?  It was a kiss I regret, okay?  I thought it was...” “Don’t you EVEN DARE finish that last sentence Joel!”  I was enraged.  I knew exactly where he was going to go with that last statement and there was no way I was going to even entertain his stupid excuse.

“Well I hope she was worth it, because you just lost me over it....I am not going to stick around and see what happens next.  You KNEW what Craig did to me all those months, and yet here we are...same boat different passenger...”  I turned to walk away “Maybe you can convince Jennifer to take care of you.  Seems she may be needed a job soon...”

 

 

** Just a little note, I know some of my readers must be very disappointed in me but I am doing my best while working, which leaves me with very little time for myself.  I am going to take some time now to rework the past posts and work on the timeline. And hopefully get some reserve posts in the bank**